Its been two days since my last entry, it feels so long...
I have been sleeping much for 4 days, that can't be good><. I had been working on my bridge making competition for the last two days, got burned on my hand, touched the tip of a hot glue gun lol. Also gottn my progress slip for this term, but not gona show parents until end of holiday ba. Seems like they can only see my failures but not my achievements. I know im starting to work hard already.
I don't know, i was bottling up everything i felt was happening in me for the last few days, I just feel like screaming now, ripping myself apart to find the problem. But i remember the delicate world i live in, my friends can't know, my parents can't know, seems like thats y i seek people online to tell my problems to, unlike the world i live in, u guys understand my pain. For awhile in the week, it seemed eazy to numb my feelings, to enjoy whats going on, but as time goes, and as i feel weaker each day, the energy i need to maintain that just isn't there anymore, the gates of the hell in me are weakening, like a balloon im about to pop.
I wish it would be eazier, like someone that would be there for me every second of my life, someone who would help me clean this path im in...
I know jie will be there for me, and i know ur going to ask me whats wrong, i know i will tell u about it when i figure it out, but ya, u still have ur cp and spooky to worry about so don't want to be a burden.
And now i feel like crying><, i need to scream soon, my mom, my friends, all are pushing whats legft of me to the limit. Right now i really don't want to do anything, i just want to sit and forget the pain.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, WHAT THE FUCK IS SO HARD TO LET GO!!!!?
I guess jie is already in msia with spooky, CP im really not sure lol, rick either sleeping or out.
Don't worry about me ok guys, enjoy urselves^^
Im just tired, confused, in pain, broken...
