Today slack with jie and cp again^^, rick couldn't online, so that was a disappointment><.
I don't know, it feels the same as yesterday, i feel something is wrong, but i don't know what. I tried showing what CP and Jie what i meant, but ya, they turned it into a joke.
I can't show them what i feel, i think its because i see them so happy now, it will bring me guilt if i told them just like that. But at the same time, i know they want to help me, in the first place i can't even get myself to tell them, i don't know why.
Seems like theres so much i don't know><, i keep asking myself that.
I definitely can't tell my friends at school the problem, i will die if that happens><.
I wish i could just forget about it, theres so much around me happening, im surprised that i am even thinking about it.
Haiz, some feelings just don't go away.
I feel the need to constantly appear happy, i don't know if thats a mistake.
Then my tiredness, that i think can't be helped, feels no different whether i sleep long or short, as long as i slept.
Anyway, it seems like im automatically happy when im talking to people, so i only can let out my feelings here, cause i really don't feel like bringing this up in that mood. At least you guys will know whats going on with me.
