Haiz, today was even worse then yesterday...
So many thoughts in me, so many feelings. I want to be happy, but my heart feels like its crying, my mind wants to fly, my body wants to stay buried, nothing i do today seems to satisfy me=(. I had no one to turn to, no one to talk to about it><.
And today not many has even cared to ask if i was ok. I guess the conflicting feelings made me seem normal. But inside, inside there is chaos and dismay.
Now i don't feel like driving my head into the wall anymore... no, now i wan to hit it as hard as i can, until i find out which will break 1st...
I feel so broken, so out of touch, even the things that made me feel comfort now give me more pain.
While playing dota, a sense of missing something keeps hitting me, while watching TV, a sense of eagerness to go back to the com, and while in maple, a strong sense of sadness overwhelms me...
No one seems to be around anymore=(, i know they are still there, just not available to help me today and yesterday.
I miss so many people, i amazingly miss my friends in school, I miss my jiejie=(, she had been busy lately><, and i miss Beebee darling=(, shes still really weak, really hope she will get well soon.
Now i feel so crushed
so broken
like a shattered mirror
Lying in peaces
no one around
to put me back together
not now anyway......
